Friday, February 29, 2008

Dr. Laura

On occasion I listen to Dr. Laura. She is a radio psychiatrist who meanders through questions from callers, between the hours of 12 noon and 3:00. I cannot listen to Dr. Laura when the kids are in the car since she often talks of inappropriate subjects for little ears. On the chance that I am listening, and the children hear her voice, I am told, "We don't like the radio when it talks too much." I quickly change the station regardless if the caller is right in the middle of a question, or Dr. Laura is right in the middle of a solution.

I am always adding to my blessings list after I tune into the Dr. Laura Show. People are hurting, frustrated, messed up, suffering, neglected, and angry, and that is the short list. Some of them have problems which are insurmountable.

I am grateful for a husband who is also my best friend, and four kids with whom I cannot imagine living without. I am blessed with a parents, and in-laws who are Christians and the ability to live where I do.

For this time in my life, I do not need the advice of Dr. Laura, and for that, I am thankful.

Thursday, February 28, 2008


I love shoes. However, I do not own masses in all shapes and hues. I am partial to spring and summer shoes because they are easy. A great pair of flip-flops or pretty sandal doesn't put too much pressure on the budget, and with a fresh coat of toe nail polish, feet can look fantastic.

I have a problem with winter shoes. I have three pair of flats that do not do well in the rain. I have one pair of boots, black, that do not go with outfits that are brown, but do well in the rain. I do not want to purchase a pair of brown boots because they cost too much money. I just want to wear my brown flip flops, but, wearing flip flops in the rain it a dumb idea. (Although teenagers do it all the time).

Ultimately, I want to wear flip flops or tennis shoes with everything. My problems would be solved. I'm sure glad that I do not live in the snow. I would need a whole new selection of shoes.

Today I am wearing flip flops. My feet are cold. I should probably invest in some toe socks to wear with my flips, although, my children would be extremely embarrassed by my outfit. On the other hand, part of our parental responsibility is to embarrass our children.

I need to make a trip to Target for a toe sock purchase. Maybe I'll start a new trend.

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Real Housewives of Orange County

I make a point to tell people from other cities and states that, although I am from Orange County, and have lived her for almost my entire life (I had a stint in L.A. county) that the Real Housewives of Orange County on television are NOTHING close to reality. They live a life that is so separate from the majority of Orange County. While most oc housewives have not received plastic surgery on their faces, a lot have had their hoo ha's enhanced. I would guess that one out of 100 have had this procedure, but that may be high.

However, I am a real housewife of Orange County. I do not live in a gated community, spend $300.00 on a pair of shoes, or have a bratty teenager who gets a BMW for her sixteenth birthday.

We drive used cars, and cook home often. We save our money to pay for summer camp for the kids, and instead of shopping frivolously, search for a great bargain. We need new couches and carpeting, but wait.

I make lunch for my kids using brown bags and buy socks from Costco. I have not purchased a new bathing suit is three years, and hem my son's pants with a needle and thread from my cupboard.

It would be funny to see how a "real housewife of orange county" survived in a home of a REAL housewife of orange county, me. She would probably run home crying, and require a massage and glass of wine immediately following her visit.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

I Have a Dish

My girlfriend, Misha, and her family came over for dinner over a month ago. She brought delicious brownies in a glass Pyrex dish. She left without taking the dish, or the brownies. After we devoured the brownies, I washed the dish, and the dish sat.

I have seen my friend at least four times since then and never have I remembered to bring her the dish.

If I put it in my car, we would likely take my husband's car and the dish would sit. If we took my car, I would get home and discover the dish, and the fact that once again, I forgot to give it to her.

I hope that she is not making brownies any time soon.

She has a hat. The hat sits. Last time we went to her house, my boy saw his hat and put it on his head. Before we left, the hat came off, and was left at her house again.

I wish that the dish fit in my purse. The inconvenience of having it there would cause me to remember to give it to her. Since that is not going to happen, I will probably just drive to her house to return the dish. And, when I am there, I will probably, once again, forget the hat.

Monday, February 25, 2008

Unlikely Perscription

Strep throat with scarlet fever=2
Strep throat with congestion=1
healthy=1-Me! Yeah!
I don't feel that great=1
cold symptoms=1

I didn't want to post about illness, but since it is all consuming at the present moment, my hands are tied. Sorry. My house needs to be fumigated with disinfectant.

My middle son is suffering through 20 doses of antibiotics. We have a count down sticky note and he only has eight more doses which seems like an eternity. I load up the syringe, and he says, "okay,okay, do it all at once, where is my juice, okay, wait, okay, all at once."

Here is a bit of important information I wasn't privy to before yesterday.

My youngest, who was diagnosed yesterday with strep and scarlet fever, is horrible about taking any form of medicine, horrible. The thought of having to pin him down for 20 doses of antibiotics was a concern which I discussed with the doctor. I expected her to go through a litany of ways to force the meds down his throat, when she looked at me and smiled. "We could just give him an S-H-O-T." I was stunned. "What? Really. You can do that." She nodded as if we were doing something illegal. "Yes! That would be great!" 5 minutes after the shot was given he was feeling better. I had no idea that this was an option for antibiotics, a fantastic option.

My biggest boy has a fever and sore throat. I asked him if he would rather have a one time shot or endure 20 doses of medicine. He remains undecided. He has until noon to make a decision. I'm waiting. Personally, I'd take the shot.

Saturday, February 23, 2008

Coupons - Bad

I am bad about clipping coupons. I have many friends who have bought into the Grocery Game where the web site owner will tell you which coupons to clip and which to save for another time based on the current deals at the grocery store. You stockpile groceries in your cupboards or garage so that you have your own grocery store as a resource and save money. With this game, though, you cannot be partial to a particular brand because the coupons cover a gamut of brands.

I cannot coupon clip or play the grocery game. I end up buying things I don't need and leaving half of the coupons at home. Sometimes they get crumpled in my purse and end up in the trash can.

I am good at gift cards and restaurant coupons. I like gift cards and often spend all of the money on the card so that no money goes to waste. I also save coupons for our favorite restaurants which offer free french fries, dollars off a combo meal, or coupons for a percentage off my total bill. I love saving money, just not with grocery store coupons.

I know that if I were to take the time to clip the Sunday coupons, play the Grocery Game, and diligently save coupons in a handy file system, I could save a ton of money but, I would rather go to four different stores and reap the same reward - savings. I typically hit Target, Costco, Trader Joe's, and Ralph's. That is the way I like to shop.

To each his own, or her own.

Friday, February 22, 2008

Pick Me!

I thought that lining kids up and choosing the top athletes to stare down the potential teamates and pick girls one-by-one to make up a team, went out with leg warmers and 8-track tapes.

Unfortunately, even though we are drowning in a pool of political correctness, this act of humiliation continues.

My daughter, who thankfully has the self esteem of Tony Robbins on Red Bull and anti-depressants, came home heartbroken (but only for a moment) since she was chosen last to make up a team of 12 girls during p.e. The hair on my arms stood straight up and I rehearsed in my mind the ugly comments I would spew at the people who thought this was a great idea. I guess that numbering off kids by saying, "team one, team two, team one, team two" until every girl is on a team takes too much - counting.

She is also the one in class who is never chosen when the teacher says, "Okay, everyone pick a partner for this next assignment." She tells me that she wanders around the class in hopes of gaining a partner, only to have everyone retort, "Oh, sorry, I already have a partner."

I have made a point of telling my student teachers to NEVER, with large capital letters, allow students to pick their own partners for a class project or let the line-up-and-choose routine occur when they have their own class. Hurt feelings are inevitable. It is much better for kids to partner with those they normally would not associate in order to build social skills and manners.

I saw with my own eyes, a student teacher who decided to let the class choose on their own the partner they would have for a science project, and I witnessed the results. Low and behold, one boy was left with no one and was placed with a girl who had experienced the same rejection. Awful! I wanted to jump up in the middle of the lesson and shout, "I'll be your partner, and then I'm going to buy you a double scoop of ice cream!!"

Rejection will happen again, I'm sure. After all, she has just left the starting blocks of the teen years.

I'm just going to have to teach her where to find thick skin. I happen to know a guy, although it takes years to put on.

Thursday, February 21, 2008

Stick 'em Up

You can tell a lot about a person by the stickers they have placed on their cars. My car is sticker-free by choice. I'm afraid that if I purchase a fish, NOTW, or cross sticker for my back window, people may question my dedication if they drive past and see me shouting at my children or cutting someone off when I have missed my exit. I admire people who cover their cars with stickers. They don't care what people think. Sometimes I care too much.

The political stickers are rampant right now. I don't wear my political stand on my sleeve, let alone my car.

I see one sticker all over town that states, "COEXIST." I have no clue what those drivers are tying to convince the rest of us to do. I'm slow that way.

I HATE, with all capital letters, the peeping kid stickers. To me they are repulsive and stupid. I'm sure those people wouldn't pee on a FORD if one was given to them, for free.

Mid-twenty something's love stickers. They love to advertise for companies with whom they are passionate. They are still caught up in the "everyone will know my opinion whether they want to or not" way of thinking. I don't, care that is, about their opinion.

If I had to advertise something with a sticker if would have to be Ralph's Chocolate Chip Ice Cream which happens to be my favorite ice cream in the world. Ralph's Grocery doesn't have bumper stickers for their ice cream, hence, my car is still sticker-free.

One of the most brash stickers I have seen said, "Single and Beautiful." I looked everywhere for the beautiful person who drove the car which was parked next to mine and couldn't find anyone. I'll bet they are single because they are too beautiful.

So, for now, no advertisements, no "my kid is a this or that," no praying girl, no college support, nothing, just a plain, old car, that needs to be washed.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Split Personality

I want to know why. Why is the crazy, active, disruptive, child the one who's teacher says, "He is such a good boy. He is a great helper and so kind to all the other students." Why?

"Really? Are you sure?" I ask. "My boy?" [she giggles as if I am being sarcastic]

I should be grateful that he behaves so well at school and lets loose like a cannon when he get home. I should appreciate the fact that he pinches his brother to the point of tears, and hugs the children at school. It should come as no surprise that he loves to help, since he wants to do everything on his own when he is home and thinks that he is 12.

I am grateful for the fact that he runs around the house non-stop, yet cuddles like the best of them and falls asleep by 7. He will repeat his kisses on my lips until it makes that "smack" sound and he gets the kiss just perfect. He kisses my leg when I am cooking, and wishes that he could spoon with me, in my bed, all night, every night.

"Good night mom, I love you, but I love Jesus more!" he shouts as I shut his bedroom door. "See you in the morning said see you in the morning!" I open the door again and whisper, "See you in the morning."

Oh my.

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Been Thinking About

I have been thinking a lot about my life as a high school student. I started writing a novel about a girl and her experiences, me, and within 24 hours, stopped. Novel writing is too hard. It hurts my brain, not to mention, I was a boring high school student. I had to make up a lot of stuff to make it exciting, hence the quitting.

Patty and I were talking about high school reunions the other day. I went to my 5th and 10th which happened to be 100 years ago. It was odd, seeing people that have grown up physically, but remained pretty much the same mentally. Patty noticed that some people approached her thinking that they had been fantastic friends in school, while she could not remember much about them and their time together. Then there were the people who she thought were great friends in high school, yet acted as if they didn't remember much about her. Odd

I mentioned the fact that all the boys, yes boys, not men, assumed that I was the same person I was the last time they saw me (flirty and boy crazy). They were weird, and immature. Not that I am terribly mature myself, but I think that they would have snuck beers behind the restaurant and played strip poker with old girlfriends, behind their wives back, given the chance.

I loved high school, although I would not want to relive those years all over again. Life was easy. It seems like we never had homework and couldn't care less about our SAT scores. Junior college was most likely inevitable and working part-time was a must. We went skiing in the winter and drove to the beach in the summer.

These days, high school is too much pressure. If students are not getting a four point eleven grade point average they may as well forget about a four year college. It's too bad.

I like being grown up, most of the time. My daughter will soon be in high school. That is my next big hurdle. Maybe she can write the novel instead of me.

Monday, February 18, 2008

It's Just Money

Strawberry season is now in full swing! I am excited. My family eats strawberries like candy and thankfully they are sweet enough that they do not require a dousing of sugar or whipped cream.

I'm not sure if my budget has room for strawberries this year though. After volunteering to bring fruit to my kindergarteners class for a party, I figured strawberries would be a fantastic choice. I visit a small stand which sits on the side of the road near a strawberry field. I like to purchase my fruit from the stand since they are fresh and sweet. When I grabbed a half flat, and went to make my purchase, I about fell off of my feet when the cashier asked for my payment of EIGHTEEN DOLLARS! That equals out to be approximately $.30 per strawberry. I paid my debt and cherished my purchase, wrapping them in swaddling clothes and perfecting the temperature in my car so they would be happy and safe.

Needless to say, the kindergarteners would not be eating strawberries. I rushed to the grocery store to purchase grapes and saved the strawberries for my family. I dole them out in small increments making sure that every last berry on the plate is eaten, otherwise a few is accrued.

My family will have to start eating more bananas. They fit my budget.

Sunday, February 17, 2008

Man Boy

I picked up my oldest son and his friends from "Man Night" at the church which is attached to his school. They played video games all night, ate as much pizza as their tummies could hold, competed in an all campus Capture the Flag game against the sixth graders, and scooped up handfuls of Skittles and M&M's without any parents tapping them on the shoulder and making them empty their palms. He and his friends were sweaty and chatty as they recapped the nights events while we walked to my car.

My son sat shotgun while I drove, and both of his friends sat in the backseat. Within the first seconds of driving out of the parking lot my big, man boy, reached out and grabbed my hand. I know full well that both hands should be on the steering wheel when I am driving, but I was not going to pass up this opportunity. We held hands the entire way home. He didn't care if his friends saw what was happening because in his world, it was just he and I.

I could not wipe the smile off of my face. I love that kid. I hope that he still wants to hold my hand when he is driving the car, and I am sitting shotgun.

Saturday, February 16, 2008

Brush Thoroughly After Meals

A tube of toothpaste is properly equipped with sound advice, "Brush thoroughly after meals."

I attended a bridal shower where many of my favorite foods were in attendance, foods I don't normally purchase for myself. I had delicious quiche, chocolate dipped strawberries, fresh fruit, cinnamon swirl coffee cake, cream cheese pastries, and coffee. I indulged to my hearts content. The shower was delicious.

I had the opportunity to chat with people that I hadn't seen in a while and catch up on their daily happenings. I met new people and swapped family stories. I questioned, listened, shared, questioned, and absorbed.

When I finally left and made my way home I was greeted my daughter. She interrupted the conversation I was having with my youngest boy. "Uh, Mom, you've got something in your teeth." A black strawberry seed sat in my front tooth in full view of all those in conversation with me, throughout the bridal shower. While I chatted, I assume that people tried to listen, but were distracted, while staring at the seedling nestled in my tooth.

If I had followed the directions on the toothpaste container, my tooth trouble would have never transpired. Note to self: Bring a toothbrush and toothpaste - everywhere, in order to avoid seedlings and their friends.

Friday, February 15, 2008

Carol, Wonderful Carol

I found out that whenever someone tells you something is going to take ten minutes, they actually have a problem with math.

I was trying to use our American Express Rewards points to buy airline tickets to Hawaii. Yep, it is official, we are ALL going to Hawaii. We have saved our points for nearly 20 years and only have to pay for one ticket, out of six! I cannot get too excited yet since we are not leaving until the end of the summer. However, the tickets are purchased and it only took three hours.

The first attempt ended with a computer glitch and the phone call marathon began, at 1:30, with one child asleep, and one quietly playing with his Legos. The second call ended with an unplanned disconnection. The third call ended with a misunderstanding in payment and the tickets increasing by $100.00 each. That is when Carol arrived on the scene. At this point all four kids were awake, active, and interrupting my phone call constantly. This was phone call number four of five total phone calls.

I won't go into entire details of the story, but I will tell you that she called me when she said she would, stayed with me on the phone so that we would not get disconnected, memorized the names and ages of my entire family, and at one point got so frustrated with her people that she wanted to pull out her own credit card and pay for my airfare.

It took a long time to finally make reservations, transfer points, and be done with the phone call. My whole family was at the restaurant waiting for me to arrive and celebrate with Valentine's Day dinner. I was 45 minutes late, and our phone conversation was finally complete at 7:18, but the reservations are done because of Carol. She is wonderful. I told her supervisor. Maybe she'll get a raise. Maybe she can meet us in Hawaii so that I can thank her personally.

It was worth the three hours. My husband owes me a box of See's Candy for all of my efforts. Come to think of it, he owes Carol a box of See's Candy too.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Call the Police

I am concerned. My young boy was drawing a picture for which he was very proud. He began by cutting out a photo of a gun from a newspaper ad. He then glued the picture on to an index card. What transpired from there was, well, interesting.

I need to preface the fact that he is enamored with police officers. He loves rules, uniforms, and weapons of every kind.

He drew a man attached to the gun, holding the gun, and pointing it at another man. The other man was crying, his mouth was open in the screaming position, and his neck was squirting – red marker.

“What did you draw Babe?” I questioned. He gave me the “Duh, can’t you tell” look and then stated matter-of-fact “It is a police officer shooting a bad guy. The bad guy is bleeding.” That much I could tell. I had a visual.

He is all about eliminating the bad guy. I don’t think that is all bad. He may not ever be an artist, but he will most definitely be a cop.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Playing Footsie

I was recently accused of pushing my husband's leg away in the middle of the night while he was attempting to snuggle and play footsie with me. While I am the first to admit that I cannot fall asleep in the spoon position and remain that close until daybreak, or sleep soundly with legs laying over mine, I cannot recall pushing his leg away from me.

One should not to be responsible for things one does in the dead of sleep, in the middle of the night. I imagine that the leg was cutting off circulation and the pushing away reaction was done out of sheer survival. A limb without circulation for any length of time may result in amputation. I realize that amputation is the extreme, but I am in defense mode at the moment.

I apologized for my error while assuring my husband that it was a complete accident. I reassured him that I love when he snuggles next to me in the middle of the night, to which he replied, "Yeah, right."

My poor attempt at excuses failed, and now I must grovel. Tonight we will spoon - until day break, after all, it is Valentine's Day eve.

I Feel Your Pain

My daughter is home [ahem] sick today. It started with heart burn in the evening, took a turn toward headache and stomach ache, made a sharp right at sore throat, and ended this morning with, "I'm just really tired." Oh my. I think that I would be more sympathetic if she would just say, "I need some snuggle time. Could I just take a day off to do nothing but snuggle?" I love honesty, usually, unless you're talking about how badly my gray hair is peeking through the brownish, blondish, caramel, hair color.

Super powers would really help me when my children claim illness. I would love to have the ability to feel their physical pain, for thirty seconds. Although I have a different pain threshold than a typical child, at least I could experience the ache for myself in hopes of determining the very best medicine. I would love to be able to snap my finger, feel their sickness, know exactly from where the hurt is coming, and either treat them at home with a medicine cabinet full of choices, call the doctor to get prescription strength meds, or send them to school with a hug and stiff glass of orange juice.

For now, I will have to drive through the nearest fast through restaurant, pick up some fruit popsicles at the grocery store, stick a straw into a cold soda, find a big blanket with which to snuggle, and hope that someone feels much better after some TLC and a whole day off from school.

Monday, February 11, 2008

I [heart] Valentine's Day

When I was teaching, my favorite holiday was always Valentine's. I still love, no pun intended, this holiday. I cut out colored hearts and tape them to the floor leading from each of my kid's rooms to the dining room table. Each of them receives a small gift and some candy. They count down the day, and sometimes I wish that they didn't expect the hearts on the ground. It takes some effort. Thank goodness my husband helps.

The littlest kids have chosen Pirate of the Caribbean valentines to exchange along with a small bag of Skittles, while my biggest boy thought it would be funny to hand out Dora the Explorer valentines to his fifth grade friends. He is also giving away a small bag of Sour Patch Kids. Yuck.

My oldest, although her class is way past the hand-out-valentines stage, has chosen some Sponge Bob valentines to give to her friends. They come complete with a candy Krabby Patty. Fun Stuff, but again, fruit candy is yucky to me.

I dream of chocolate from See's Candy I have already made one trip to See's candy for some red foil covered, milk chocolate hearts to distribute to some teachers, and still need to make another trip to purchase some goodies for my family. There is no chocolate better than See's. Argue all you want, I am not budging on this opinion.

Strawberry soda sits in my refrigerator awaiting some vanilla ice cream, straws, and a spoon - a perfect dessert, and the paper hearts still need to be cut. I will wait to the last minute as always, but the kids will never know. As long as they are able to eat their candy for breakfast, life is as good as it gets, for now, and, I better get some See's chocolate too...hint, hint!

Sunday, February 10, 2008

Buying Drinks

Ever since I became pregnant with my first child, I have lost my desire for soft drinks. I used to love Diet Pepsi and even had a craving for Dr. Pepper served over crushed ice (the kind that is shaved and very hard to find) during pregnancies number three and four. However, I am a water girl now. I will take an occasional sip off someone else's soda if my water is empty, but I prefer, room temperature water.

Everyone else in the family likes soda. While our oldest child didn't sip the sweet goodness until she was five, the second, third, and fourth have had the "nectar of the gods" very early on. I am not going into specifics. People may drop their jaws.

Since I am not the soda drinking sort, I abhor purchasing soda for anyone else in the family. Actually, it is the spending money on sodas part that I have trouble with. In my opinion it is such a waste of money. The other night we spent ten dollars on sodas that were left on the table unfinished. Prior to ordering our food I had the urge to run to the nearby grocery store, buy a six pack of Coke and then return to the restaurant, but I didn't. I know, I know, just say, "no" and make everyone drink water. It is considered a "treat" when we go out since they don't have soda at home.

From now now I just going to carry a cooler of soda in the back of my car. Next time we decide as a family to eat out, we can just ask for cups of ice. I'll supply the soda and save a mound of money. I promise to pour the drinks under the table so that no one will point their finger in disbelief. Self-dignity anyone? I guess that I'll have to think of a new plan.

Friday, February 8, 2008

Dealing with the U

I'm not having a proud moment. As a matter of fact, I'm feeling guilty. My reluctant learner who happens to be in kindergarten got his report card today. He received a "U" in "reads sight words" and "reads three letter words."

I am the first to tell all of friends who fear the fact that their kindergarteners cannot read, that it is a brain issue. Kids will not be able to read until their brains develop that section. However, I'm sure that if I worked, with all of my might, with my kindergartener and quizzed him on his sight words, they would quickly be recognized. That, is a memory issue.

This weekend, he will be exercising his brain muscle. He will be quizzed on his sight words until he is sweating letters. As I mentioned before, he is reluctant, so this process will have to include money. He will not leave my house on Tuesday morning for school until he knows all 25 words.

For now, I am determined. I'm not sure how long my determination will last though, I have a pedicure appointment tomorrow.

Thursday, February 7, 2008

Ying and Yang

I visited two classrooms today. That is what I do part-time. I over-see student teachers with Concordia and Vanguard Universities. Trust me, it sounds much smatter than it actually is, really.

One of my students is in Santa Ana, and one of my students is in Newport Beach.

The Santa Ana class is equipped with the basic necessities: white board, overhead projector, and, shared by the grade level, an image projector which projects on to the white board, any piece of paper you place under the camera. It is very cool.

The Newport Beach classroom, in addition to the image projector, has a "Smart Board." This is a gigantic interactive white board, the size of a chalkboard, that can do everything this side of washing your car and picking up necessary groceries. They average cost is $2,200. Multiply that by 20 classrooms=a ton of cash.

Both classes have fantastic student teachers who are experiencing very different environments. Orange County is so diverse. I just hope the students in the classrooms are given the same learing experience, then again, how could they.

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

Kiss and Make Up

We haven't quite kissed, but evidently my mother's cat read the post that I wrote about her and felt bad. I saw her today and she didn't cuss at me like she normally does. I walked out the front door where she was sunning herself under a bush, and I stopped to do some dreaded lunges. I had all intentions of ignoring her and telling her once again that I do not like her, but she immediately ran to my side. I am not exaggerating, she ran as if I was her best friend that she has not seen for two years.

Shortly after rubbing on my leg she began meowing and walking in circles around me. She was apologizing. Reluctantly, I reached my hand out toward her body expecting a hiss and bite, while quite the opposite occurred. I scratched her back because I don't know what cats like and figured that all animals like to have their backs scratched. She liked it. She began to purr, yes purr, at me! Her cussing was replaced by purring. I dropped my jaw too.

I kept scratching her back, all the while making sure that she looked me in the eye. I didn't want her to open her eyes unexpectedly, see my face, and begin meowing and questioning the reason why I was touching her fur. I can't handle the cussing. It's rude an offensive. She saw my face and was still purring. What gives? Maybe she went to counseling. She needs counseling.

I wonder if she will still like me tomorrow. I'll let you know, however, I'm not expecting any miracles.

Tuesday, February 5, 2008

Doing Dishes

I love when the thought "I need to do the dishes" consists of opening the dishwasher and spending the next 30 seconds placing a sink full of dishes into my new, great-working dishwasher. I hate the unloading aspect, but at least I don't have to rinse and dry on my own. Bring on the dishes!

Monday, February 4, 2008

Where are the Cops?

"Sixty percent of fatal intersection crashes are caused by yellow and red light runners T-boning left turners and green light jump starters." ( I knew the rate had to be high since I am a witness to red light runners and stop sign sliders all the time. I am amazed at the amount of people who turn right on a red without stopping, or those who cut off my jog because the are turning left on an arrow which has already turned red. There are never any police offers around to catch the law breakers.

I assume that people are in such a hurry that they have deemed themselves in charge of when they can go through an intersection and not some glaring signal. Admittedly, I have pushed through an orange light; however, after reading some staggering statistics, I am going to follow the law more closely.

I rarely witness drivers making a complete stop at a stop sign either. There used to be a joke in my husbands family that S-T-O-P stood for "softly tap on pedal" and last time I had to endure eight hours in traffic school someone asked how long you had to stop at a stop sign. The teacher simply stated, "You have to make a complete stop." Folks in my town, roll through stop signs and I am always aghast by those who barely slow down. As if the stop sign is so inconvenient.

It is no wonder why there were over 43,000 fatalities in the US from car crashes last year and that car crashes are the number one killer among teens, not drugs, car collisions. Yikes! My daughter will be driving in less that a year. That scares the crud out of me. Maybe she will adhere to my request of wearing a helmet and chest protector in addition to a seat belt when she starts driving.

Sunday, February 3, 2008

Super Bowl Snacks

While I am not concerned with who is playing in the Super Bowl, where they are playing, or when they are playing, I do know one thing. I have one special request on days where endless amounts of food grace dining room and coffee tables in homes all across America. I must have onion soup mix dip, and Ruffles potato chips. I will gorge on this chip and dip combination until there is no room for the real meal and then attempt to shove down what ever dinner offering is available regardless of my stuffed state of stomach.

This year is going to be different. I have happened upon a strawberry stand, in the rain, and purchased my first-of-the-year, half crate of fresh, delicious strawberries, course one. I then went to our favorite semi-fast-food Mexican restaurant to purchase tortilla chips and guacamole, course two. Marie Callendar's is having their pie sale, so my son and I drove there and bought chocolate cream and cream cheese pie for the end of the meal. We will top the cream cheese with the fresh strawberries...yum-o, course four. I know that I skipped course three which will be pork ribs and baked potatoes. Wow.

I think that I post about food too much. I may have need to venture out and try writing about something other than food, but food is so, well, good.

Happy Super Bowl eating!

Saturday, February 2, 2008

Cat Fancy

I am not a cat fan. If you happen to have a cat that acts just like a dog, then, I could be a fan. My mother's cat ducks and runs whenever I reach my hand out to pet her, and if I do happen to be sitting close enough to touch her fir, nibbles at my hand as if to say, "Get your flippin' hand off me." She sounds like she is cussing at me when she meows.

This is not the type of pet I would like to have as my own. Since this cat wasn't originally hers, and was found meowing in her garage, my mom has decided that her behavior is a result of her being abused by another family. I think that she needs to get over it. My mother gives her fresh milk every day, allows her to roam free, and, she has no indoor or outdoor restrictions. For these reasons she should be grateful, and kind to others, well to me.

She is outwardly unfriendly to me. She sees me almost every day, and although I have never hit her or done anything to abuse her, I do tell her that I don't like her and have been tempted to curse at her when she gives me one of her meows that are just short of shouting in my face.

I am a dog person, big dogs in particular. Please don't buy me a cat.

Friday, February 1, 2008

Driving Charlie

In the age of freaks and bad guys I took a step of faith and did my good deed for the day. While I was approaching my mother's house, with my four year old buckled in the back seat, I observed a crippled man with cane and a small brief case at the entrance to the housing complex. He was practically in the middle of the road, so I had to maneuver a wide turn in order to avoid hitting him with my car.

I wanted to ignore his waves and talking which I could not hear since my windows were up, but, since I am the type of person who likes to help people, and fingered he just needed directions some place. I stopped my car and rolled down my window.

"Could you give me ride to the bus stop?" he questioned. Before I could conjure up an excuse at to why that would be impossible, "Sure" erupted from my lips without my being fully aware of what I had just agreed to do.

Painstakingly, he hobbled with his came, unable to bend his knees, and shimmed into my car, with great difficulty. My first thought was this: If he was a freak or bad guy, with his disability, I could take him down in a heartbeat. My second thought was this: My four year old and I could totally take him down if he attempted to reach for a gun or anything that appeared suspicious. I had a cap gun handy also, and I was not afraid to use it.

Charlie, who missed a ride with his wife, was looking at his electric cart for a back up to get him to the bus, which would take him to the local junior college where he teaches political science. The battery on his cart was dead, which left him in the hand of the goodness of mankind. That is when I arrived on the scene.

Charlie was harmless. I had no fear when I agreed to drive him to work. We had a great conversation. He needs prosthetic knees because of a botched surgery done in India, his hometown. I told him about God, he knows God. He told me about Mahatma Gandhiji. It was a pleasant morning. In the future I hope that I am able to help others, without expecting them to harm me in some way, although, all the freaks and bad guys make it extremely difficult.