My elbow has been bruised and achy for the past two weeks. It swells and turns purple for no apparent reason and then the pain shoots up to my shoulder. The same ache arises in the muscles and, although this isn't reason to cease from using my left arm, the pain often makes me edgy.
While I was driving the other day, I felt another surge of pain up and down my arm, and more specifically in my elbow. When I reached to locate the throbbing, I felt an abnormal, swelled lump.
Since I have no recollection of falling down, or bumping my elbow severely enough to cause a bump and bruise, I thought through my day in hopes of figuring out why I had swelling and pain in my arm. Nothing came to mind.
I had spent the morning watching 4 year olds at church. I recall that while I was sitting on the floor playing games with them they jumped on my back and I fell to the ground, however, I was only kneeling and instead of falling, more or less, I teetered to the floor. They then ganged up on me and yelled, "dog pile!" Before I could stop them, I had four, 4 year olds, on my back and side. I had to catch my breath, but I did not bang my elbow in all of the chaos, I'm sure of that.
My mind then began playing games with me. What if I have bone cancer? What if I tore something in my shoulder or elbow and need surgery? What if I have some bone disease and they have to amputate my arm? Perhaps I could still use my right arm in that case, and I could tell people my testimony of how a bruised elbow turned into a disease and my arm had to be amputated.
Why does my mind go to the most remote of awful situations?
I told my son my story of taking a hurting shoulder and elbow all the way to cancer and aputation, and he assured me that he has gone through the exact same thinking process when he has had injuries. Whew. That made me feel more human and less freaky-like.
I have an appointment at the doctor today. I'll let you know what happens, and whether I need Advil, surgery, or amputation.