Toe Hair

For fifteen dollars I can get a 45 minute pedicure complete with a leg massage, nail trimming, cuticle clipping, and beautiful polish application—money well spent. I am sure to shave my legs prior to my session since I do not want the Vietnamese ladies talking in a language I do not understand, babbling on and about me and my hairy legs while I am trying to enjoy the moment.

I frequent the same salon for my pedicure pleasure ride and before “picking a color” (nail polish) I grab a cup of coffee from the grocery store. I am low maintenance when it comes to coffee. I can catch up on my magazine reading and listen in on a few conversations around me, solve the discussed problems in my head, and then return to reading. Wonderful.

One day my girlfriend and I decided to visit a different salon which was known for their unique polish designs. For your birthday, you could get little candles painted on each toe, for Christmas baby Jesus and an entire nativity scene, (okay, maybe not a nativity scene, but they do paint Christmas trees complete with lights) and for fancy, party toes, you can get rhinestones glued on for extra added bling-bling.

As we sat, waiting for our toes to dry (I had rhinestones applied) we flipped through photo books with pictures of all the different designs that they offered. The pictures were taken after women had their toes painted so the entire photo was…toes…painted toes. Not only are toes gross, pictures of toes are gross even when they have pretty polish applied to them. The grossest part however, was the number of toes with small patches of hair on them. The hair was dark, nasty, long, and took away from the pretty paint job. We shut the books at once, and lost our impending appetites.

The moral of the story: If you are going to get a pedicure, shave your legs. If you are going to shave your legs, by golly do not forget to shave the tops of your toes. You never know when they are going to land themselves onto the glossy pages of a nail salon scrapbook.